Falling in love can be exhilarating, and it’s natural to want to spend a lot of time with the person you’re attracted to. However, it’s important to remember that losing yourself in a relationship is possible. This can happen for various reasons, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that the relationship or you are unhealthy.
Different people may experience different forms of losing their individuality in a relationship. Some examples may include:
- Giving up hobbies or activities that you once enjoyed
- Neglecting time with friends
- Devoting all of your time and energy to your partner or relationship
For a relationship to be healthy and fulfilling, try to find a balance between growing with your partner and maintaining your autonomy. This often requires compromise and being mindful of preserving your individuality.
The question is – how can you maintain your individuality in a romantic relationship? The following are nine ways to keep your true self while loving one another:
1. Always do you!
After ending a relationship that had consumed me, a close friend reminded me to “be true to myself.” As I entered a new relationship, her words stuck with me. I took the time to reflect on what truly defined me as an individual. I made a list of my unique qualities, interests, and values. I realized that, for my future relationships to be successful, I had to stay true to myself rather than try to be someone else. I had to “do me” in all aspects of my life, not just my romantic relationships.
Related Article: How to be Assertive in a Relationship in 6 Steps?
2. Surround yourself with healthy people
It’s essential to surround yourself with positive and supportive people, as the influence of harmful or unhealthy individuals can affect your well-being. This includes limiting your exposure to drama and negativity. Cultivate a support network of individuals who lift you up and genuinely care for you. This will help you maintain a healthy mindset and positive outlook.
3. Invest in your passions
Another crucial factor is to use your resources wisely, focusing on career development, education, health, and personal interests. Since money and time are limited, it’s important to make thoughtful decisions about how they are allocated. While relationships require some investment, they should not consume all of your resources.
4. Keep your friends close
Your group of friends is like a support system. Maintaining close relationships with those who support and guide you is essential, especially in a romantic relationship. I’m referring to meaningful connections, not just casual acquaintances. Surround yourself with people who will give you honest feedback, even if it’s hard to hear, as they have your best interest at heart.
5. Stay connected with family
Despite their dysfunction and quirks, families are a vital part of our lives. Maintaining connections with family, no matter the state of romantic relationships, will play an essential role in staying connected to oneself and one’s roots.
In difficult times, turning to the family can be a source of support and a reminder of one’s true identity. Though not everyone may have a positive family dynamic, finding ways to connect with one’s roots and sense of self will lead you toward mental well-being.
6. Set boundaries
Boundaries are essential in any relationship. They serve as a guide to help individuals maintain their independence and protect their well-being. Setting healthy boundaries from the start can prevent misunderstandings and hurt in the future. Don’t be afraid to communicate your needs and expectations, such as the amount of space you require, which aspects of your life are off-limits, and what values or interests are most important to you.
A partner who truly cares for you will understand and respect these boundaries. A healthy relationship requires two individuals who maintain their independence and respect each other’s boundaries.
7. Hold on to your logic
When we are in love, it can be easy to let our emotions overpower our logical thinking. However, we must remember that emotions and logic have their place in decision-making. It is not a choice between one or the other, but both should be considered.
Maintaining a balance between listening to our hearts and minds will enable us to make healthy and sound decisions in a relationship.
8. Lead a balanced life
Having a balanced life plays an integral role in overall well-being. It involves finding equilibrium between various aspects of our lives, such as self-identity, relationships, work, physical health, friends, etc.
When we notice that one or more of these areas are out of balance, we must take steps to restore balance. Failure to do so can lead to negative impacts on the specific area and our relationships. So you must keep an eye on all the aspects of your life and work towards bringing them back to balance.
9. Find a way to let go
Ending a relationship can be difficult and painful, but it is essential to remember that not all relationships are meant to last. Sometimes it is necessary to let go of a love that is not healthy or beneficial for us.
Letting go may involve feelings of sadness, anger, and despair. But we have to remember that these feelings are normal and temporary. Eventually, you will heal, move forward, and even find the strength to thrive.
The key takeaway
Don’t give up hope if you’re struggling in a relationship or losing yourself. We all make mistakes and have different experiences shaping who we are.
It’s okay to ask for advice from friends, family, or strangers. Writing about my own experiences has helped me work through some of my issues, and I hope I can help somebody else out there, too, by sharing them. If you have any issues and want to share them with someone, feel free to ask!