Are you a newly married person or about to get married and fear those quarrels that people usually face in these kinds of relationships? You would want to work out the ways to avoid any fight with your partner, and so you decide to plan out things from before. But to devise a strategy to avoid conflicts every now and then, you need to know the reasons why clashes occur. Once you get the know-how, you can clearly define the roles and responsibilities so that an argument does not even initiate in the first place. So without further ado, let’s look at the reasons why married couples fight.
1. Financial matters
You are new to the relationship and so giving up on things is quite natural. In the beginning, everything seems just perfect, but later on, you will realize financial matters should have been sorted out as these always make it to the list of top reasons married couples fight.
Analyze your responsibilities and define the percentage each would be contributing to run day-to-day expenses. If you have dependent parents, communicate this to your partner so that paying their bills does not create any issue every month. With the rising inflation rates, finance is an important issue, and the earlier it is addressed, the better it is to avoid any future misunderstandings or fights.
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2. Chores and responsibility distribution
Gone are the days when only women were expected to look after the house and the kids. Now it is the responsibility of both people to do the work and play their part in the children’s upbringing. Since house chores are one of the primary reasons for the fight among married people, it should be addressed at the beginning. Decide who will wash the dishes and do the laundry, on the very first day. Plus, when you have kids, define who will do the pick and drop, and who will change the diapers. To avoid monotony, you can switch tasks every week, and ensure there is a balance of workload assigned to each person.
Taking your partner for granted is one of the most important reasons married couples fight. First, you expect someone to leave everything for you and commit to a relationship, and later, you treat them like a showpiece, expecting them to bear everything with silence. Well, your parents and siblings are important, and you have limited time in the day, but then your partner has so many expectations from you, and so undergoing an argument or a serious fight is quite normal.
Therefore it is advised to set your priorities right from the beginning and define the time and attention level you are going to allocate to your spouse, so that they can limit their expectations and you can create a balance between all your important relationships.
The difference between sex drives is yet another important factor that contributes to frequent fights between partners. If you have a higher craving for intimacy and your partner doesn’t match your level, the chances are high that you might suspect them of an extra-marital affair, and then obviously, those fights are quite normal.
You need to understand that some people actually get tired, and so sex does not fit into their daily routine, and this definitely does not indicate the absence of interest in you. Give your spouse some time and discuss intimacy in a thoughtful way. Remember feeling offended every time is just going to make the matter worse. So work out ways and give your mate some space because sex is just one component of the relationship that can be worked upon. It is definitely not worth those fights you face every day.
Infidelity is cheating, and fighting in such cases is quite justified. If your partner is disloyal to you and you find out, there is no way to put those arguments aside and ignore the whole matter. You have given everything up for that one person and if that person does not value your contribution and sacrifices, just walk away. They are not worthy of your time and love.
At times, your spouse might even ask for a second chance but remember, once a cheater, always a cheater, and so there will be a time when they will try to prove themselves right despite being wrong and act as if nothing happened. You deserve some peace, and so instead of fighting every day and running your life, it is better to call it quits.
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There are many reasons for fights between couples, where some are big, and some are just petty issues that can be avoided. If you keep your things lined up from the beginning, you can save yourself from getting involved in those mind-draining arguments and save your time and energy to be used on something more productive.
Remember, clashes are normal in marriages, and leaving your spouse or prolonging these fights will just steal your peace of mind, so try to work around ways to prevent them in the first place and only choose to walk away if the problem is something big and beyond your control.