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8 Proven Ways to Build Emotional Intimacy in Marriage

8 Proven Ways to Build Emotional Intimacy in Marriage

Have you ever wondered that without technology to their rescue, what did older people do to develop a relationship of trust with each other? They managed without the free WhatsApp calls and long drives and worked together to make themselves feel safe and secure around each other. This is where emotional intimacy comes into play. It is the phase where you allow yourself to bond with your partner through actions that involve expressing feelings, vulnerabilities, and trust. 

Where everyone always emphasizes physical intimacy, it is important to note that emotional intimacy is equally important. But before we jump on to identifying the ways to develop emotional intimacy in marriage, let’s look into the built-in barriers people have that make it difficult for them to build strong emotional connections. Once you identify these, you will be in a better position to break them and get more emotionally attached to your spouse.

The reason behind weak emotional connection in marriage

There are many reasons why people refrain from trusting others. The major ones are depression, shyness, personality disorder, or behavioural traits of hiding emotions. In all such cases being open in relationships seems a hassle, and so the person takes long before surrendering in front of their partner. Well, breaking these barriers is challenging, but then there are ways that you can use to your rescue and save your relationship from failing. If the other person is important, you will definitely work out a way to enjoy your bond with them.

Also, note that emotional intimacy has different meanings for different people. For some, it is cuddling in the corner of the house, for others, spending quality time together on weekends or laughing over silly jokes does the trick. The idea is to feel safe around your partner at all times and believe that they are the answer to all the challenges and problems you face in life.

So it is safe to say that there is no secret formula for building emotional intimacy in marriage, it’s an art that you can master by working on some ways that help in developing deeper connections with one another.

Ways to develop emotional intimacy in marriage

Emotional intimacy is a beautiful thing. Use the following ways to enjoy this core fundamental need of your relationship.

1. Put in the right effort

In a relationship, we often forget to show genuine care and support to a partner. Well, in order to build healthier connections, you need to keep a few points in mind. When your mate is speaking, be sure to listen with presence and compassion. This will make them feel important and heard. Respect their opinions even if they think differently than you. This is the beauty of every relationship and will give your association some room to grow. Also, check what is going on in their life and how they feel about it.

Once you practice these little things, your relationship will definitely get stronger, and you and your partner will enjoy each other’s company even more than before, as now your interest will be linked to each other’s goals and values in life.

2. Appreciate more

It is a proven fact that when you highlight the positives in your partner, they will feel good about it.  This action of yours will make your spouse feel secure. This way, they will realize that they have a valuable companion, and so they will make every effort to maintain their relationship. This two-way approach is a great way to give water to your emotional intimacy, making it grow to higher levels.

Well, don’t feel awkward or confused as you are not asked to spend every minute pouring forth gratitude, but obviously, you need to acknowledge their actions and the positivity that your partner brings to the relationship on a regular basis. That’s essential and the perfect route to developing a bond that will last for ages. 

3. Focus on meaningful actions

When was the last time you two danced together? If you don’t remember the date, you are in trouble, and a lot of effort is required to develop the link you are looking forward to. A healthy routine together is very important, and it’s magic should be applied to your relationship too. So focus on some small, easy tasks and enjoy the emotional intimacy you get as part of the package.

These acts can include a cup of tea together after work, a breakfast date before going to the office, a small kiss right in the morning, cooking your favorite meal while spending time with each other, etc. Add these rituals to your hectic schedules, and closeness will come in automatically. 

4. Improve your conflict management skills

Conflicts in a relationship are normal, but if you allow these battles to expedite, your marriage can be in danger. You definitely don’t want to go in the reverse direction. So improve your skills in managing the arguments in a healthier manner. Once you do so, your emotional intimacy will automatically grow, making your connection with your partner stronger. Just be careful not to handle a conflict poorly; otherwise, you will spend the next few weeks fixing the damages caused.

5. Try new things together

Have you ever experienced excitement with your partner? If not, then start it today, as these new things are the key to a more intimate relationship with your mate. A good approach is to make a list of things you guys love doing together. Once the list is prepared, it is time to execute the actions.

If you don’t know what to add to the list, think about the past and the things that seemed enjoyable when you did them. In case you still cannot recall anything, find some new fun things and try them out to create new memories and hence get closer to each other.

6. Surprise your better half

Surprising your spouse at different instances can be one of the best routes to developing emotional connection in marriage. You can use gift therapy or can pick some flowers to make your significant other feel important. Also, doing a chore to make them feel relaxed is another favor you can do for them and make them feel valued. These small gestures will double your emotional intimacy instantly. Don’t believe us? Try it out and enjoy the closeness you get as a result.

7. Invest in your wellbeing

This is the most important part of the list as your self-esteem and confidence play a great role in developing any kind of intimacy with your partner. 

If you don’t feel good about yourself, your insecurities will stimulate conflicts, and so responding positively to each other will become more challenging.

So spend some time on yourself and work on your inner fears first. Once you are clear on your goals, becoming passionate in your relationship will get easier. 

8. Spend time with each other

It is your duty to not only set aside some quality time but also increase the number of hours too. When you get time, you start doing things together, and when you do some cute things with each other, you get to enjoy opportunities for an enhanced level of bonding and increased communication.

Furthermore, you can add flavor to your conversations by listening attentively and maintaining eye contact with your spouse. This will make them feel loved and respected, and their urge to get closer to you will increase.

Summing it all up

Creating a relationship is easier but maintaining it is quite tricky. People emphasize on the importance of physical attraction, but before everything else, an emotional bond should be created to develop comfort and trust with each other. Once this is done, other things will fall into place automatically. So give your relationship some time, and once you build an emotional connection with your spouse, you will surely enjoy every moment spent together! 

Dr. Quratul Ann Ghori

While she is not patrolling the wards or tending to her patients, Dr. Ghori delves into the sanctuary provided to her by words. Like your standard copywriter, she is - minus the pun - never content with her creative juices despite churning a fine piece, she believes! She enjoys writing, and there are two things that she loathes, despite their necessity, that is, the number of words limiting her flow of thought, and of course, burnouts! To nourish her mind with sanity and creativity alike, she tries to chug as much coffee as possible to make the process flow better.

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